WTF!
I don't know whether to be angry or sad.
Nothing...
Nada...
Zip!
Not even a "Happy Valentine's Day Den".
I'm starting to feel like an old fool out here.
As broke as I am I run out and get a nice gift...
only to feel stupid.
How many times am I going to be hurt before I get it?
Duh!
I wanna go home!
I'm beating a dead horse here. She isn't for me and she just wants me because she doesnt want to be alone.
Shit I really fucked up my life this time!
Getting out of here would be no easy thing.
Number one I have the best job I've ever had! I'd really miss it and finding one as good back home would be pretty tough.
Plus....youre gonna laugh at this one...I'd miss her so bad.
So what do I do?
I need advice.
Nothing...
Nada...
Zip!
Not even a "Happy Valentine's Day Den".
I'm starting to feel like an old fool out here.
As broke as I am I run out and get a nice gift...
only to feel stupid.
How many times am I going to be hurt before I get it?
Duh!
I wanna go home!
I'm beating a dead horse here. She isn't for me and she just wants me because she doesnt want to be alone.
Shit I really fucked up my life this time!
Getting out of here would be no easy thing.
Number one I have the best job I've ever had! I'd really miss it and finding one as good back home would be pretty tough.
Plus....youre gonna laugh at this one...I'd miss her so bad.
So what do I do?
I need advice.
posted by Cliffhanger Jones at 6:05 AM
5 Comments:
Hi Den,
It's a struggle - I can tell - I'm probably the last person to give any advise since I've only really ever been in one relationship but here goes for whatever it's worth. It seems like you might need to try to let go of any and all expectations and find some joy in the act of giving no matter what the outcome. Sounds like you already have a "pro and con" list for staying in your relationship and when it's all said and done the good outweights the bad - I do know from my experience that it's difficult to not keep comparing the present to the past - I have finally pretty much accepted the fact that my life isn't necessarily bad but it is for sure "different" - maybe you can try to accept "different".
One thing I do know for sure is that somedays I'd give almost anything just to have someone to hold my hand - seems like all those little things in life have a great value. Lots of thoughts spinning around and hard to put into words - sometimes I think about "running" and have to stop and remember the old saying "no matter where you go - there you are" - at any rate, I'm listening and feel free to email me anytime if I can help in any way.
I'm going to be in Eugene starting tomorrow - hope we don't get too much snow or ice on this side of the Mts. - it was a mess in the Portland area this morning.
God bless,
Bill
Each day of your life brings fesh hope. Faith gives us the hope to go forward, to follow the path or make our own. Keep a positive attitude, by looking for the little blessings that happen every day,yet go unnoticed. Bring the good time memories to light and put awat the worries and pain. The good times will remind you of how your life HAS BEEN AND IS IMPORTANTANT. Never forget that there are people who love and care about you; people who want to help and support you through life's difficult times, and people who think you're pretty special. accept the support' feel the love and joy of being worthwhile. Use your faith, your inner strenth, to help you cope with the changes, the tough and the difficult choices. Hold on to your faith, and don't be afraid to feel like the morning sun is shing... JUST FOR YOU!
were are you? why have you not been posting hope everything is ok with you?
Hey Den, I miss your posts too - have been stopping by every day - hope all is well. S.
hey I hope everything is ok ? you did not call this week let me know if you are ok!
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